The past few weeks have been incredibly crazy around our house. Ever since the summer visit to North Carolina, we have been walking on eggshells wondering what was going to happen with Greg's job. I went ahead and started the school year like normal because we hadn't heard anything at that point. Towards the end of August, the human resource director from Asheboro contacted Greg and said that they were going to begin hiring for forklift positions and needed a copy of his resume. So, we get a resume together, send it, and then play the waiting game again. Several weeks pass and we don't hear a thing. I took it as good news because I was completely against relocating to another area. Two weeks ago, my world is turned upside down because they offer Greg a job and tell him that they need him to begin work on Oct. 5th. So we not only have to relocate, but we only have had two weeks to do it in. This past week, we went back out to Asheboro to find a place to live and I had a job interview. We were able to find a very nice rental home for a reasonable price.
Ever since our trip, I have been on a roller coaster of emotions. While we were out there, I was completely comfortable and it just felt like we were right around the corner from BG. It didn't really hit me how far away we were until our drive home which seemed to take FOREVER! Now, I've been having all of these doubts and going back and forth about going. I don't want to split up my family, but the thought of being so far away from everything and everybody that I know scares the living daylights out of me. It's a beautiful area and a wonderful opportunity, but I am nervous about my panic attacks coming back. What will I do if one hits and I'm home alone with Kaylee while Greg is working? It's not like any of my family members can hop in a car and come right over. What makes it worse is the fact that my grandparents told me that they will NOT come to visit. My grandparents are like my second parents because of the amount of time I spent with them when I was younger. How could they do that to me?
I know that with Greg's job, we can't pass up this opportunity, but why did it have to be 9 hours away? What will make it easier is the fact that our immediate families have already said they will make frequent visits to see us which won't be that different from now because we don't hardly see anyone as it is. I know everything will work itself out when we're there, but at first it's going to be very hard. I am just so scared to leave everyone behind, but I know other people do this type of thing all of the time. Most of my family on my dad's side lives somewhere other than here. Several people that I went to school with are living somewhere else now due to jobs. I just never thought it would happen to me.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Saturday, September 5, 2009
A Handful of a Class and Terrible Twos
This year is definitely my most challenging year in teaching yet. Working at a high poverty school with 96% free and reduced lunch rate, brings it's own challenges, but nothing like the ones I have this year. Over the summer, we added a fifth second grade teacher to reduce class size so this year so far I have 21 students (the ideal number right?). In this class of 21 students I have five serious behavior issues, five instigators to get the five serious behavior issues angry, and then about 7 students that never stop talking even with consequences. Anytime my back is turned, my wonderful friends wind up fighting in some form. Now, usually with 7 year olds, it's simply arguing or poking, but with this bunch it's serious grabbing, punching, and kicking. Needless to say, I cannot turn my back for even a few seconds without having to break up something. Now I understand that these kids are exposed to things I don't even want to think about a kid being exposed to, but I think most of the issues is a lack of discipline at home. I know as a child if I would have even thought about doing some of the things these kids do, my rear end would be in a sling after many rounds of spankings. I just don't get how some parents could let their children rule the roost instead of enforcing some form of discipline.
With that being said, I'm having issues with my own child at home because we have officially begun TERRIBLE TWOS! I have received two notes from daycare this week about Kaylee pulling hair, biting, and hitting not only the other kids but the TEACHERS TOO! Obviously, I'm a firm believer in discipline and spankings which is why my child is really only acting out at school. She will try that behavior with me once, get a spanking, and won't try it again. However, she is very intelligent and has figured out that the only consequence at school is time out so she's becoming a demon of a child (figuratively speaking of course). I know the teachers probably think I'm doing nothing about it, but what can I do when she acts out there? Spank her at home for something that happened several hours before? That will do no good because it has to be taken care of her right then and there. I have tried talking to her right before she leaves every morning, but she really doesn't understand what I'm trying to say. I know it's just a stage and most likely when she gets moved up to another room, hopefully it will get better, but until then, I'm at a loss for words and ideas.
On a positive note, I feel better than ever. After my miscarriage and surgery, my blood pressure has gone back to normal, my anxiety has pretty much disappeared, and I just feel overall happier. It has taken almost a full year, but I finally feel like my old self. This goes to show that even though a miscarriage is a horrid thing to experience, for me it was a blessing in disguise due to all the health issues I was already experiencing while being pregnant. This experience has brought Greg and I closer together and we now have a better appreciation for each other and our family. We know when our time is right, we'll have another child. Until then, we will enjoy the family that we already have. :)
With that being said, I'm having issues with my own child at home because we have officially begun TERRIBLE TWOS! I have received two notes from daycare this week about Kaylee pulling hair, biting, and hitting not only the other kids but the TEACHERS TOO! Obviously, I'm a firm believer in discipline and spankings which is why my child is really only acting out at school. She will try that behavior with me once, get a spanking, and won't try it again. However, she is very intelligent and has figured out that the only consequence at school is time out so she's becoming a demon of a child (figuratively speaking of course). I know the teachers probably think I'm doing nothing about it, but what can I do when she acts out there? Spank her at home for something that happened several hours before? That will do no good because it has to be taken care of her right then and there. I have tried talking to her right before she leaves every morning, but she really doesn't understand what I'm trying to say. I know it's just a stage and most likely when she gets moved up to another room, hopefully it will get better, but until then, I'm at a loss for words and ideas.
On a positive note, I feel better than ever. After my miscarriage and surgery, my blood pressure has gone back to normal, my anxiety has pretty much disappeared, and I just feel overall happier. It has taken almost a full year, but I finally feel like my old self. This goes to show that even though a miscarriage is a horrid thing to experience, for me it was a blessing in disguise due to all the health issues I was already experiencing while being pregnant. This experience has brought Greg and I closer together and we now have a better appreciation for each other and our family. We know when our time is right, we'll have another child. Until then, we will enjoy the family that we already have. :)
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